LOA Lesson 4 - Competing with the Alpha Male

Throughout nature the female of the species is attracted to the alpha male in the hope that she will be able to bear his offspring-offspring that have the best chance of survival in the cruel world they are going to be brought up in. These females are not looking for a meaningful, long term relationship; a quick interlude, then the privilege of gestation. A fortunate fact, since the alpha male often has a harem and while he protects all of them he does not give any of them his undivided attention.

All of these philosophies hold true to the human alpha male as well. While he is fiercely loyal to the people he defends and will go out of his way not to hurt them neither will he be able to give any of them his heart or the promise of a future. The woman that can pin down the alpha male is a rare specimen indeed. In the meantime, there are many other fish in the sea who are looking for something more than the alpha male has to offer, and it is this population that holds the key to defeating the alpha male's hold on the female of their choice.

A non-alpha male looking for a relationship needs to go into the situation with his eyes wide open; he is going to need to be looking for a permanent relationship but not be expecting one (proposing on the second date is out, regardless of how long you have been dreaming about a woman). The woman who has opted to explore her possibilities other than the alpha male is going to go into the situation cautiously, with an eye towards what the man in question has to offer. This man is going to need to be able to provide her with a secure financial future (if he is in early twenties this can be supplemented with the pursuit of a college education and a realistic ten year plan) as well as give her the emotional security she was lacking with the alpha. If a man is not an alpha male and does not feel that he is in a position to give a great deal of himself to a woman he should not place himself in a situation where that is going to matter (i.e. an actual date). He is going to need to keep it light and friendly to avoid gaining a poor reputation among the females of his acquaintance.

The emotional requirements seen to, let us turn our attention to capturing the eye of a woman. If you are not an alpha male you are not going to have the advantage going into the fight that you would have otherwise, but you are not entirely without resources. Women are attracted to competence. If you can arrange a situation where she can see you doing what you do best (whatever that is) you are going to want to take advantage of this. If you are not in a position where you can establish such a situation (such as approaching a woman in a bar) remember that women love confidence as well.

Don't:

- Stutter
- Drool
- Spill your drink
- Say anything resembling a come-on line

Do:

- Smile (naturally)
- Talk in a normal tone of voice
- Look her in the eye
- Start a conversation. If you have trouble with this one pick any topic related to the situation in which you currently find yourself (the environment, not the part where you are trying to get her attention)
- Walk her to her car at the end of the night
- Get her phone number
- Call her!

If you carefully adhere to these guidelines and allow a relationship to grow between the two of you based on common interest and respect it won't be long before she'll be able to look at you and say, "Alpha who?"